What’s Sex Got to do with… Future Husbands

Every little girl dreams of the perfect wedding day with a beautiful dress, walking down the isle to the man of their dreams. Little do they know, the struggles and stereotypes along the way to finding their dream guy.

 Kathleen interviewed a college student named Joseph. She asked him, “Do you think that guys or girls are looking for someone they’re going to end up marrying while they’re in school? He replied saying that he doesn’t think that people think about that until they’re older now and that he knows someone who has been in a relationship for two years and the thought of marriage even scares him (Bogle 53).

My question is: Why do couples in college spend two years with one another if they cannot see themselves spending the rest of their lives together? It makes sense, right? Also, why does the thought of love and commitment cause boys to choke up?

Kathleen Bogle discusses how girls are much more determined to find “the one” than boys are, especially in the college scene. It was commonly found that most girls and boys had different predictions as to when they wouldlike to get married. Men had plans of waiting longer, and women wanted to be married by their mid twenties. Twenty-five, if I’m being specific. Therefore, by the time that senior year of college hits the pressure rises. I think women are more commonly known to think about their wedding day because it is supposed to be one of the best days of their life. I know girls who already have a wedding board on Pinterest. Not because they’re crazy in love but because it seems like such a beautiful and exciting event.

According to boys, when girls say they like them they think marriage.

Meghan Trainor recently released a song called, “Dear Future Husband”

A few verses saying:

After every fight

Just apologize

And maybe then I’ll let you rock my body right

Even if I was wrong

You know I’m never wrong

Why disagree?

Why, why disagree?

               I’ll be sleeping on the left side of the bed

Open doors for me and you might get some kisses

Don’t have a dirty mind

Just be a classy guy

Buy me a ring

Buy-buy me a ring, babe

 You gotta know how to treat me like a lady

Even when I’m acting crazy

Tell me everything’s alright

Perhaps this is why guys get scared whenever girls tell them that they like them. They may think that girls become controlling and demanding and they don’t want to be “tied down” at such an early age. Did the reactions from the boys of Kathleen Bogle’s interviews surprise you? Why do you think the thought of marriage freaks guys out? Do you think that this song is a bit excessive? Do you think that media scares guys by displaying false interpretations as to what marriage will be like? Are all guys scared of commitment?

3 thoughts on “What’s Sex Got to do with… Future Husbands

  1. I think that there is pressure put on women to be married by a certain age, but for men it isn’t quite the same. Women typically desire to be a wife/mother and see that as one of their most important roles, but men often value their careers and put off having children and getting married. Men are often expected by society to be the providers for their family, and many may not want to settle down until they know they support their wife, and potential children. For men, marriage is also often portrayed as something that ties them down and limits them, therefore many may be hesitant to get married in their twenties. I think the song is a little much because it supports the idea that for most women the goal is marriage, which can sometimes drive men away if they aren’t ready.


  2. First off I really enjoyed this post because it pointed out some very good point and questions that really had me thinking. The reactions from the boys I wouldn’t necessarily say surprised me but I would say that when people think about marriage it is on an individual time frame. I would also feel confident saying that women think about it more than men because I know tons of girls including myself who plan their wedding on pinterest. I also feel like the thought of marriage freaks most guys out because that is a huge commitment and there are a lot of choices, understandings, fights, and agreements that go into something like marriage. I just feel some guys and even women aren’t ready for that yet. The song pointed out in the blog I would say is a bit excessive especially when you read into the song and I wouldn’t necessarily say songs, movies, show, and media scares guys into not being committed or getting married but I do think they sometimes have that picture in their head on how it may turn out if you take certain steps.


  3. I have to agree with what this post is saying. I know that entering college often tends to be the start of the search for a husband in many young women’s lives. I think there has been a greater shift away from this mindset, but there are still plenty of people who think that way. I think the song was extremely excessive and I would definitely be concerned if a person I was interested was already making demands for our married life. The one line I did appreciate in the song, however, mentions that her husband has a 9 to 5 job, but that she does as well, so he shouldn’t expect dinner on the table. I think the true motive behind the song is that she wants a man that respects her and treats her well, but I think the phrase “future husband” is too much.


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